Review: Scary Movie 5

If this film was judged based on my expectations of it before seeing it, it would get a glorious five stars for being exactly as predicted, utterly painful and not even remotely funny. 

Yes, i should have seen it coming when i saw the poster

I know I should have avoided this like the plague, but the early instalments of the franchise were pretty funny in a totally mindless kind of way. I missed the fourth one, but remember the third wasn’t too bad. And after recent cinematic travesties such as Disaster Movie, Epic Movie, Super hero Movie, Movie Movie and so on, I thought the return of a familiar name, and the one that (unfortunately) started them all may not be so bad (I must have been out of it). So, not one to judge before seeing a film, I went in with an open mind, and left feeling like it had just been defecated on.

The plot is not only thin, but also all over the place as the makers try to cram in a rediculour combination of movie parodies, some of which are not even current (Inception, black swan, Rise of the Planet of the Apes) some which haven’t (or at the time of making wouldn’t have,) even been released (Evil Dead, Mama) and some which are not even films (50 shades of grey), and if you hadn't noticed, most of which are not even horror movies. Each and every so called parody falls flat imediatly, and instead resorts to a slapstick fist fight, every single time.

In Short: Charlie Sheen’s career is further down the toilet than previously believed, and former Disney teen queen Ashley Tisdale had jumped in with him (possibly in a dreadful attempt to distance herself from her tween friendly typecast) as previously stated avoid like the plague.

I can't Believe you Haven't Seen: Dr. Strangelove

Dr Strangelove or: How I learned to stop worrying and love the bomb

Holding the prestigious honour of having the longest title of any Best Film Nominee is Stanley Kubrik’s 1964 satirical Cold War classic. Both this film and the Cold War may have been way before my time (Like most great comedies it would seem) but the subject Is one that I personally find very interesting, and one that is just as relevant today as it was almost 40 years ago. As such I made it the first film in my long list of films people keep telling me I should see (especially if I run a movie blog!)

Dr Strangelove instantly shot to the top of my list of favourite comedies. Taking the very serious, and at the time very real threat of all out nuclear holocaust, and turning it into something hilarious is in my mind one of Kubrick’s finest ideas. The studio refused to create the film unless the ever-hilarious Peter Sellers was cast in at least 4 roles; however, he gave up the role of Maj. “King” Kong on the grounds that he couldn’t do a Texas accent. This of course resulted in Slim Pickens riding the A-Bomb and waving his cowboy hat as it plummets towards its target triggering the end of the world as we know it.

The cast is stellar, the jokes stand up better than films released just a few years ago (“You can’t fight in here, this is the war room!”) and the direction is impeccable, making me wonder why on earth Kubrick never attempted comedy again, as we learn how our end will be bought about by the incompetance, distrust and constant attempts at one upmanship of our political leaders. I can’t recommend this film enough.